Mommy, Look What I Found!
My three-year-old son is irresistably drawn to my bedside table. It has the usual fare in it: ear plugs and condoms.
Jack knows that he's not supposed to play in there, and he usually obliges, however it had been months, and the overwhelming urge to sneak a peek had crept up on him.
He came out in to the hall, saying, "Mommy, look what I found!" He held up a gold Trojan Magnum like a first-prize candy award, triumphantly in the air.
And I found myself doing that stupid thing that verbally-grappling mothers do. "Put that back. You don't want that. That's medicine." Sometimes, you just don't know what to say.
Should I be hiding these things? I don't think so. It's a part of life, and shouldn't be shameful. So why do I say it's medicine? Cause he's only 3, right?
I remember on a daily basis my friend Melissa and I would trudge over to her wholesome parent's bedside drawer and extract multi-colored, mint flavored condoms, and delightedly conjure all of the potentially illicit acts that could be performed with the colorful little gems.
Someday, I'll explain. No, lets hope there's a man around to do it by that time.
Jack knows that he's not supposed to play in there, and he usually obliges, however it had been months, and the overwhelming urge to sneak a peek had crept up on him.
He came out in to the hall, saying, "Mommy, look what I found!" He held up a gold Trojan Magnum like a first-prize candy award, triumphantly in the air.
And I found myself doing that stupid thing that verbally-grappling mothers do. "Put that back. You don't want that. That's medicine." Sometimes, you just don't know what to say.
Should I be hiding these things? I don't think so. It's a part of life, and shouldn't be shameful. So why do I say it's medicine? Cause he's only 3, right?
I remember on a daily basis my friend Melissa and I would trudge over to her wholesome parent's bedside drawer and extract multi-colored, mint flavored condoms, and delightedly conjure all of the potentially illicit acts that could be performed with the colorful little gems.
Someday, I'll explain. No, lets hope there's a man around to do it by that time.
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