"Just Follow the Rainbow"

Looking sane and being sane do not necessarily go hand in hand.

Alright, I have gathered the stamina to add in a quip about my last "date". Which made me really ready to just stop this whole project. This date was a number of weeks ago, but I just felt like givin' myself the Hello Kitty cake before I bothered writing about this.

1) He was polite. He sent a photo. He lived in the neighborhood. (No, I didn't tell him where I live. Rule #3452: Never tell a person where you live.) We spoke on the phone. It was not exciting, but he lived in the area, and the last "roll" was so unprodigious that I settled.

2) We met at a local bar. It was quite crowded, and I had forgotten to ask what he was wearing. I broke my own rule.

3) A guy who profiled like a "nerd" sat next to me. He was skinny as a noodle with hair parted on the side and spectacles and an oxford shirt buttoned to the top, or something like that. The type who watches Star-Trek.


4) We both ordered beers, and I found myself thinking...Is this the guy? They both had that similar kind of button nose. Was there a remote possibility that the two photos I had recieved of a well-built, confident-looking man turned out to be this Trekkie? I decided to ask if his name was Richard. It wasn't - I was relieved - but where was the other guy?

5) I went to the basement to try his cell. (I bought a Virgin cell phone during all of these escapades, by the way.) There was no answer. I started wondering if I was possibly getting stood up.

6) I sat back down. I keened my head around. I saw a potential Richard. I walked over to the guy at the window. It was him.

7) We had a conversation. It was not unpleasant, yet not thoroughly intriguing. All I could think was...I think this guy is gay, trying to be straight. And he kept asking me about my son. Also he appeared to be half-listening to what I was saying, thinking about something else.

In the process of the conversation, he told me his mother was Puerto Rican and his father was Irish/Sicilian. I was puzzled, cause he just looked like a wasp to me.

8) We walked out, and this really tall gay guy on uppers and drunk was wobbling down the sidewalk, asking right in our faces,

GUY: "Where are all the GAY people? Are there any gay people in here?"
ME: "No, you don't want to go in there."
RICHARD: (hesitantly) "That way."
GUY: "Which way? But what's the name of the place?"
ME: "Just follow the rainbow."
GUY: (hugging me) "Oh, I LOVE you!"
RICHARD: "There's a place called the Connection"
GUY: "Thank You! I'm going that way! Bye! I love you!"

Then Richard gave me his card.

Richard Van Finkee

Interim Ruler of Iraq

His address was 2 blocks from mine, and his number was on there, a standard-looking card. I was weirded-out - I just don't get his humor. I thought, "This is the humor of someone who spends too much time alone, in his own little universe." I thought...people like that can be dangerous.

Richard wrote me the next day:

Hola Chica,

Lovely meeting you last night. Let me know if you'd beup for dinner sometime soon.

Richard

Nathalie wrote:

Hi Richard - thanks for meeting me. I enjoyed talking with you. You had some interesting points.
N

Then he called me on my cell, but I didn't call back....I felt bad about that, but the card just really gave me the creeps.

So, I was glad to stop Craig's Listing. But...I wouldn't knock it - there are some strange people on it but there are also some who seemed pretty decent. My take is still pretty much the same, after a few months experience, as it was when I wrote this.